UPCOMING SOCIALS & PROJECTS & EVENTS  

More socials, projects, & events coming soon!

Rotaract Fund Raiser
If anyone would like to donate money to GRA (Global Rotaract Alumni Club) they can donate the money on the GOSC site and include a note that it is for GRA. This would help us tremendously to continue growing as a club and be able to conduct larger scale projects. Here is the donation link: Donate Now – Global Offsite Care

Opening The Meeting:

“I Gotta Feelin’…”

President Julia once again set the tone with the uplifting anthem of our age: “Tonight’s gonna be a good night.” And who are we to argue with the Black Eyed Prophets? The music hit, the members swayed (or at least blinked), and the meeting was underway.

Of course, the good vibes took a quick detour when Pete Lescure got up for the pledge and thought for the day. Pete kicked things off with all the confidence of a freshman giving his first book report – equal parts charming, confusing, and somewhere in there, legal? There was a quote about law and equality that may or may not have been plagiarized from The Red Lily or a fortune cookie – we’ll never know.

We do know he recovered quickly enough to be the hero (?) of the Joke of the Week later. But more on that in a bit.

Visiting Rotarians & Guests

Zero visiting Rotarians. More cookies for us. Seriously. The cookies were the best part of lunch.

Diane Moresi introduced her good friend Susan Brink, who has relocated from San Francisco to the banks of the Russian River — where, presumably, she’s waiting for donuts to float by.

Curt introduced Michael Tomjum, who is pending induction once he returns from his noble quest across the beaches of Hawaii. Aloha and Godspeed, future Rotarian.

Sunshine Report

Ginny Cannon shared that longtime Rotarian David Cooper passed away on October 11 at the age of 85. He was an active leader in both Rotary and Toastmasters, and he will be missed.

We passed around a card for Jack Tolan, who is recovering from illness, and Debi Zaft gave us a reassuring update on Cecil Humes, who is healing at Summerfield.

Opportunity Drawing: The Rigged Edition

Dan Balfe headed up the Opportunity Drawing today.

The pot: $117.

The marbles left: 5.

The winner: Not me.

The suspicious coincidence: Dan Balfe had HIS ticket pulled. Sure, Jeannie Levin pulled the ticket but I saw her being chauffeured after the meeting in a fancy car so maybe Dan and Jeannie have a little racket going.

Justice prevailed (slightly) when Dan didn’t pull the blue marble. The pot thickens!

Joke of the Week

Michael Moore gave us a classic about people trying to measure a flagpole’s height with thumbs, shadows, and prayers… until Pete Lescure, our resident engineer, shows up, pulls the whole flagpole out of the ground, and measures it lying down.

Punchline: “Isn’t that just like an engineer? We needed the height and he gives us the length.”

Pete: A hero and punchline all in one.

Announcements

• Julia shared an emotional video of a Polio survivor who hand-cycled across Canada to raise awareness. It was a reminder that the fight against polio is not over. If you’re feeling donor fatigue, that’s totally normal. Just donate anyway.
• She also gave a preview of the Children’s Christmas Nutcracker Program, which we’ve been doing since the mid-80s. This year, 108 kids and 12 adults will see the show, get hand-baked cookies, and receive personal letters and gift cards from Santa. Diane Moresi is leading the effort. Santa approved. So do we. Thank you, Diane for stepping up for the kids!
• Casey D’Angelo announced:
  • Laura Stephens is off to Colorado for good. It’s like we’re not even her favorite mountainous state anymore.
  • As a result of Laura ditching us, we need someone to help prepare the check-in table for meetings. See Casey if you can help.
  • Lunch prices are going up starting in January. $35 with RSVP, $37 if you’re a rebel, and $12 if you’re just here for the cookies.
• Ann Gospe brought a pie utensil that someone left at her last party. You know who you are. Come claim your spork.
• Craig Meltzner let us know we’re close to naming an outbound Rotary Exchange Student. Yay! Also, we need a second host family for our current inbound Rotary Exchange Student. Volunteer or prepare for Craig to guilt-trip you in increasingly creative ways.

Recognitions

Steve Olsen appeared in the Press Democrat, which might be the biggest burden a man can bear. Fortunately, the news was good: Shone Farm won four gold medals for their wine, best of class for olive oil, and were named top food producer.

Steve celebrated by giving $100 to the Jameson Fund and cancelling his newspaper subscription. Balanced.

Paranto Party Popup

As if the meeting wasn’t lively enough, President Julia cranked up The Beatles’ “Twist and Shout” and gave us a glimpse of the Paranto boogie. There may or may not have been some shoulder shimmies from the crowd. We won’t name names. (It was Pete. Probably.)

Program: River Talkin’

Susan Nowacki introduced our guest speaker Rob Schwanker, Executive Director of Russian Riverkeeper. He bravely admitted he was a longtime Kiwanis member. Gasps were audible.

But he quickly won the crowd over by revealing that Kiwanis is an ancient word meaning “Future Rotarian.” He then gave a thoughtful presentation on efforts to clean up the Russian River — including removing 500,000 pounds of trash last year alone. Yes, that’s half a million pounds. Pete alone accounts for at least 12% of that just in dad jokes.

He also talked about environmental advocacy, removing invasive bamboo (Arundo donax, not donuts – mystery solved!), and the importance of equitable river access.

Then came the Q&A, where Pete Lescure somehow tried to hijack the speaker and invite him to another meeting. Somewhere else. Maybe he was offering him a job flying drones? Or proposing? Unclear.

Rob’s Russian River Presentation Slides

Final Thoughts

It was a good day. We danced (a little), laughed (a bit), and somehow allowed Pete to bumble his way into multiple key segments of the meeting. If only the opportunity drawing had gone the same way…

See you next week. Bring cash. And maybe a tape measure for Pete.

Respectfully (and irreverently) submitted,

Matthew

Rotarian | Journalist | Still Bitter About That Drawing*

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